The Mist

Man was I exited for this one. I’ve heard nothing but good stuff about the latest Stephen King adaptation, “The Mist”. I even like Thomas Jane, ever seen “Thursday”? Well, Jane’s acting in the unknown crimedy “Thursday” deserves an Oscar compared to his shit performance in “The Mist”. Man, nothing happens. A storm hits a small town and people go to the grocery store for supplies. A grab box of A-typical characters are assembled in the grocery store ala’ King’s “The Langoliers”. Suddenly a bloodied man bursts into the store as a thick mist quickly envelops the whole town. Different A-Typical characters start hypothesizing about what the Mist could be. Key characters in the group become defined. There’s the religious zealot Ms. Carmody (Marcia Gay Harden), the surprisingly tough geek, the good old boy biker, the logical doubter, the military brats who know what’s really happening, and the strong, fearless hero David Drayton (Jane) with his young son in tow to show his vulnerability.

Since the death of the original American Pie franchise, the Sherminator has been working in this grocery store as a bag boy. He doesn’t believe there’s anything to fear in the Mist, ventures out and gets killed to death by the fakest set of CGI tentacles I’ve ever seen. At this point I almost turned the movie off. My friend told me today he did turn the movie off at this point. I informed him of his mistake.

Most will start watching “The Exorcist” at a certain key point in the film. That point where the shit hits the fan and the pace quickens the fuck up leading to a powerful climax (insert sexual innuendo here, I suggest “like whacking off”). The first act of The Mist is negligible, characters are established, one person gets killed, and the viewer doesn’t know what to believe yet. Then it builds.

A group led by the logical doubter ventures out into the Mist. The good old boy biker ties a rope around his waist and follows them. Only the bloody bottom half of biker boy is pulled back when the rope is drawn in. A group led by Drayton (Jane) heads out to get meds from the pharmacy next store and most of them die horrible, insect related deaths. When Drayton gets back to the grocery store he falls asleep for a while. Key point happens here.

When double D wakes up he finds most people trapped in the store are now followers of Ms. Carmody, the religious fanatic. They decide to blame one of the military brats for what’s happening. The grocery store butcher stabs him several times and they all throw him outside the store into the Mist. He gets torn apart by a huge bug like creature straight out of “Starship Troopers”. The mist concept is really effective here as you can only partially see the huge creature ripping apart it’s victim. What’s more effective is the element of human horror. Outside are unseen deadly creatures, but inside are people driven to madness and murder by their own fear.

A small group led by Jane forms, and they decide to try to make it to a vehicle in the parking lot and get away. The religious zealot is waiting by the door to stop them and they kill her. They head out into the world only to find the Mist is everywhere. And everywhere in the Mist are deadly creatures and certain death. There’s a great scene where the escapees are all in Jane’s truck, the Mist enveloping them, and a huge creature walks stories above them. I won’t ruin the rest.

The Mist starts out shitty, but ends up being an effective thrill ride with a shocking twist ending that you’ll be thinking about days later. See it, put up with the first half or so, and after that enjoy the best King short story adaptation since 1408.

**This review is of the DVD edition of Stephen King’s “The Mist”.

**The Mist Trivia: In the movie, “The Shop” created the Mist. The Shop is the scientific government group that caused all the trouble in “Firestarter” and “The Tommyknockers.” Drew Barrymore says: “Fuck The Shop!”

Picking up a roll of duct tape on the way to your house,



~ by exploitnation on April 8, 2008.

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